What to Do With Leftovers: Chinese Food Rice Edition

19 01 2010

I got this after I Googled "angry rice." It made me giggle, because it was not my intent. HAHA.

Hey hey! My Sig Ot eats a lot of terrible food. I mean A LOT. McDonald’s Hardees, Burger King, Taco Bell, you name it, he eats it. But one thing he does not like? Rice. Yeah, I know. Who the fuck doesn’t like rice? “Only an asshole, you’re probably thinking to yourself.” And you would be mostly right. EXCEPT. Now I have this boner for rice pudding, so when he orders the mediocre MSG-laden dishes from the joint down the street (“There’s vegetables! he insists), I get at least one take-out container full of the shit. Most of the time I forget it’s in my fridge, only to have my rice-pudding hopes dashed by finding it weeks later, crammed in the back of the fridge next to my powdered buttermilk and something that may have resembled a lemon at some point. But this time I had a plan. Sort of. Okay, not really. I had America’s Test Kitchen Family Cookbook. So I made fried rice one day, and then tonight, I decided, would be the night when 2 became 1….wait, no. That’s not right. No, I decided I would try my hand at rice pudding. I actually wasn’t all that impressed with America’s Test Kitchen recipe, as it took too long to make. So I hit the innernetz and found a recipe so easy, I can’t even remember where it was or how I found it. AND! It was made with coconut milk, which, of course, I love. So here it is. It took about 20 minutes to make, and I’m not entirely sure that it’s “real” rice pudding, but it is goddamn delicious, which is more important anyway.

Coconut Milk Rice Pudding (kinda)

  • 2 cups precooked rice (the size of a regular amount from a Chinese joint)
  • 1 14 oz. can coconut milk
  • splash of whole milk
  • about 1/4 cup sugar
  • splash vanilla (I also added a splash of coconut flavor because I’m cray-cray like that)
  • some cinnamon and/or nutmeg if you’re feeling saucy
  1. Bring coconut milk to a simmer. Add sugar to dissolve along with the whole milk. Stir.
  2. Toss the rice in, stir it around, and add the rest of the stuff.
  3. Let it simmer til thickened, stirring kind of often, and remembering that it will thicken after it starts to cool. So don’t be a dick and overcook it.

The end! Happy eating!

Oh, and here’s this for good measure (probably an accurate portrayal of what happens when El and I get together and run errands):

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